And there's this One Particular Harbor...  
...Sheltered from the wind
Where the children play on the shores each day
And all are safe within
                   --Jimmy Buffett, One Particular Harbor

For a long July 4 weekend, I can't imagine doing anything more fun than going to the beach.  So that's what we did.  And while we still have not mastered the art of packing light while traveling with an infant, we are getting to the point where we take less crap along with us. 

And Jay, for the most part, was loving life on the coast.  He had the undivided attention of his LaLa and his Great AJ, and he performed all the tricks he's got.  He's really mastered the rolling over trick, and performed it over and over and over and over and over again, much to the delight of all his admirers.  He even showed off a new trick - munching on his feet.  Yep, finally got that enormous big toe into his mouth.  It was hilarious to watch because he works SO hard at it.  It's a two-handed process - one hand goes behind the ankle to pull the foot toward the face, and the other serves as a guide to get the toe into the mouth.  But once he figured it out, man, he could not get enough.  When we got home last night, I swear the look on his face said, "Sweet!  Those toys came home with us from the beach!"

And the entertainment was not all of the indoor variety.  We suited Jay up with the swim diaper, the too-big Hawaiian print swim trunks, the t-shirt, and the big floppy hat.  (Uncle Matt said it's more flamboyant sombrero than manly sun hat, but what does he know?!)  Add one uber-thick layer of baby sensitive suncreen and the kid was READY!  (Of course getting him to that stage only took 45 minutes.)  So we took him onto the beach to explore the sand & get his first dip in the ocean.  I can't say that he was exactly thrilled about it, but he didn't cry so I figure that's a good start.  He's a Pisces, so our little fish has got to love the water, right? 








Let's go back to the beach!


Posted by jmfoster ( Jul 07 2008, 10:43:51 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [1]

You're my angel, you're my darling, angel...

So I had completely convinced myself that I would post every week, and here it is almost 2 weeks since I posted.  Where does the time go?  Oh wait, I remember!  It goes to washing pumping parts and bottles!  I have spent more time standing at the sink washing dishes in the last 4 months than I have spent there cumulatively in my whole life.  Luckily, I have Derek the Dish Master to help most nights - thank you sweetie!  Those dishpan hands are so sexy!

Tonight Prince Jay is FINALLY sleeping peacefully (after only 45 minutes of bouncing, swaddling, paci-replacing, rocking, more bouncing, and finally nursing him to sleep).  And while he's not always easy to get to that blissful nap, I am really lucky because he's such a great sleeper.  He sleeps about 10-11 hours every night.  Yup, he goes to bed around 8, and usually we have to wake him up at 7 so that we can feed him and get to work/daycare on time.  Some nights, we lay him down in his crib and he's happy to conk out within 2 minutes.  Other nights like tonight, he prefers to wail at the top of his lungs for a while first.  And on the occasions when he does wake up in the middle of the night, it's usually after one of the wailing evenings.  So we'll cross our fingers that he's down for the count this time. 

But he's just SO angelic when he's finally sleeping.  I love going in his room just to stare at him while he lays there peacefully.  The problem is that his door hinges are very squeaky, so everytime I peek, I run the risk of waking him back up.  I really should invest in some WD-40...


I know, it's an older pic, but I think he looks so sweet!  He's my angel.


Posted by jmfoster ( Jun 26 2008, 08:59:47 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [1]

In my next 30 years...
I think I'll take a moment, celebrate my age
The ending of an era and the turning of a page
Now it's time to focus in on where I go from here
Lord have mercy on my next thirty years

Hey my next thirty years I'm gonna have some fun
Try to forget about all the crazy things I've done
Maybe now I've conquered all my adolescent fears
And I'll do it better in my next thirty years

My next thirty years I'm gonna settle all the scores
Cry a little less, laugh a little more
Find a world of happiness without the hate and fear
Figure out just what I'm doing here
In my next thirty years

Oh my next thirty years, I'm gonna watch my weight
Eat a few more salads and not stay up so late
Drink a little lemonade and not so many beers
Maybe I'll remember my next thirty years

My next thirty years will be the best years of my life
Raise a little family and hang out with my wife
Spend precious moments with the ones that I hold dear
Make up for lost time here, in my next thirty years
Okay, I don't typically post the entire song, but this time I couldn't resist.  Today is my thirtieth birthday, and I think that those lyrics are all good ways to spend my next thirty years. 

But first, I must apologize for being so incredibly slack about blogging.  Forgive me, readers, for I have sinned - it has been over a month since my last blog update.  To say that my life has become infinitely busier since returning to work is an understatement.  Anything more than getting up, getting Jay up/fed/into clean diaper/dressed/diaper changed again/re-dressed in an outfit sans poop/into carseat/to daycare is pretty much out of the question these days.  I had always had a question in the back of my mind about how to end the blog - but just ending without any official end really isn't fair, so I won't subject you to that.  And he's getting so darn cute that I really do need to post some new pics.  (They're at the bottom, but you better not just scroll past all my chatter to look at his cute mug!)  So don't give up - I am going to get back to more regular posting!

So yesterday, we had a big ol' birthday bash to celebrate the fact that Derek and I both turned 30.  His birthday was last Saturday (June 7) and mine is today.  We had a pig pickin' party in our backyard with lots of friends and it really was a celebration to remember.  I had a blast catching up with folks and watching our kids play, even if I had lost my voice and couldn't do much of the talking myself. 

So what's new in Jay's world?  His biggest trick is that he can roll over from back to front.  (Well, he's done it once, and gotten REALLY close a bunch more times - I say that counts as a trick!)  Most babies roll from front to back before back to front, but not our little prodigy.  And he's discovered his feet, which is hilarious to watch.  He gets this super-excited look on his face like "Whoa - there are those things again!" and spends the next 20 minutes trying to get them into his mouth.  Unfortunately, his little round belly gets in the way and he hasn't managed the toes to mouth thing quite yet. 

But he has mastered the art of getting lots of other things to his mouth.  He likes to gnaw on fabric in particular - our shirts, his nasty burp cloths, funky bibs --- mmm, sour milk.  Gross to us, apparently tasty to him.  And he's a big fan of grabbing things in general.  His favorite thing to grab is a big handful of Derek's arm hair.  I think it's funny.  Derek - not so much.

Jay got to meet lots of new people yesterday including his cousin Camden and Aunt Mandy & Uncle Ryan from Omaha/Dallas.  (Where are you guys these days, anyway?)  Camden, a normal-size baby, makes Jay look  like the Jolly Green Giant.  He's continuing to grow so fast, speeding through the newborn and 3 month clothes and now into 6 month size.  He weighs in at a whopping 14 pounds, 11 oz these days. 
..
Okay, so here are those pics I promised.  Cutie, huh?  And a wonderful way to spend my next 30 years.







Posted by jmfoster ( Jun 16 2008, 08:13:06 AM EDT ) Permalink Comments [2]

We are family...
...I got all my sisters with me!

Okay, so Jay doesn't have any sisters, and neither do Derek or I.  But we've got all the brothers, cousins, uncles, grandparents and great aunts that a kid could want.  And this weekend, Jay got a chance to hang out with almost all of them.

This was Jay's first chance to interact with the entire Perry clan.  Growing up, most of my holidays were spent at Appie & Papa's house with my mom's extended family.  She's one of 5 children, and when the whole clan gets together, it's quite a party.  I've seriously never interacted with so many people who each think that they are the funniest person in the room.  (Truth is, if they weren't all in the same room, they each would be the funniest!)  Her siblings are hilarious, and they love to tell stories.  The louder the telling and the funnier the story, the better.  (I think they nearly scared Derek off the first few times he met them, but my smashing good looks kept him around in spite of my family.)

On Friday afternoon, we headed to Asheville to celebrate Aunt Kylie's graduation and reunite with most of the Perry clan.  (Jen's first cousins, while technically "first cousins once removed" are going by the "Aunt/Uncle" titles.)  We caravaned with my parents & brother and made it after only 2 baby-feeding, gas-getting, bathroom breaks.  He really is a great little traveller - as long as mom kept singing "She'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes" to him, he was perfectly content.  We only had to make up a few verses to the song.  The trip was uneventful, and as soon as we got there Jay got loved on by all of his cousin-aunties, especially Aunt Kelsey.  She was great with him and has already mastered "The Bounce."  As long as he's bouncin', whether in the stroller on a bumpy road or in your arms as you dance around, he's usually pretty content.  And in her arms, he was pretty happy.

He had a great weekend.  He didn't seem a bit bothered by all the passing around or the noise of the crowd.  Great Aunt Beth (aka GABby) spent most of the day Saturday snuggling with him, and that gave me and Derek the freedom to do a little exploring in downtown Asheville.  Yahoo!  Luckily, I believe that we rescued him before she had a chance to teach him the UNC fight song... that was a risk leaving her with him unsupervised, but he was still wearing Wolfpack red when she returned him to us, so I think we're safe.

Then, on the way home, we took a brief stop in Mocksville to give Jay a little time with his Granna and his Great Aunt Bonnie (guess she's a GABby also?!) and his Mammaw, his only great grandparent.  Family time all over the state!  He showed off his biggest smiles for Mammaw, and I think it was about as good a Mother's Day gift as she could get.  Then he pooped in her lap, and while not the best Mother's Day gift, it was entertaining.

I only wish that Jay's other great grandparents could have had the chance to meet him.  Derek and I were both unusually close to our grandparents, and we lost 4 grandparents in 6 months last year - both of my mom's parents and both of his grandfathers.  It was a really tough time, but we know that they are all looknig down our little cutie and cheering us on from above.  We miss you guys!
Posted by jmfoster ( May 12 2008, 05:05:41 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [3]

Workin' 9 to 5...
...What a way to make a living!

So, the maternity leave days are over, or at least nearly over.  I started back to work on Tuesday.  For the month of May, I'm working Tuesdays, Thursdays and half days on Fridays to get back into the swing of things more gradually.  We've got quite a collection of Jay-sitters while I'm out - grandmas, aunts, and even Derek are all getting in on the temporary daycare. So it's certainly a little easier leaving him with people who love him as much as I do (or maybe even more in the case of the grandmas!). 

And returning to work really wasn't as hard as I expected.  Other than forgetting all my passwords to access all my systems, it was pretty much as I had remembered it.  Phones ringing, emails landing in my inbox, and students waiting outside my door - typical day in the Financial Aid world!  Honestly, in some ways, a day in the office is much easier than a day home with Jay.  I know what to expect and when to expect it.  Very rarely do I see anyone crying in my office.  I spend a lot more time sitting at my desk and a lot less hauling dirty burp cloths back to the washer.  But the end of my maternity leave makes me think back on what I expected compared to what it was really like.  Here's a rundown:

What I expected - taking long walks in the sunshine around the neighborhood with Jay in the stroller
What I got - taking long walks in the middle of the night up and down our hallway with Jay crying incessantly

What I expected - Meeting friends for lunch at North Hills with Jay in his carrier
What I got - Grabbing a bowl of cereal during Jay's 15 minutes of napping and calling it both breakfast and lunch

What I expected - Doing work on the Financial Aid FAQ system while Jay napped quietly in his crib (actually got a laptop from work for this purpose!)
What I got - Doing work on the gigantic pile of laundry, aka Mount Burp Cloth, desperately hoping that Jay would nap for more than 15 minutes this time

What I expected - Nursing when he was hungry, anywhere and anytime (I'm a liberated woman - of course I can discreetely nurse in public!)
What I got - Lots of time nursing my good friend Medela the breastpump

What I expected - that I'd have the cutest baby ever
What I got - the cutest baby ever.  So cute, in fact, that I spent quite a few hours just watching that angelic face sleep in my arms.

Yes, maternity leave was both a hundred times more work than I expected, and a hundred times more rewarding than I could have ever predicted.
So quiet down, cobwebs
Dust, go to sleep
I'm rocking my baby
and babies don't keep.


Posted by jmfoster ( May 07 2008, 10:15:57 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [3]

Who are you? Who, who, who, who?    
Well, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
I really wanna know (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
Tell me, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)
'Cause I really wanna know (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)

First, an update on the scheduling from the last blog posting.  Just file this under the heading of “Reason #274 you should listen to your mother:”  Jay is SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT!!  Yes, you read that correctly.  At 8 weeks, he is pretty consistently sleeping 7 hours in a row.  We so happy we do Dance of Joy!  (Remember the old show “Perfect Strangers”?  As if y’all needed more proof that I’m still stuck in the 80’s, here I go pulling out another old TV reference...  And my sincere apologies to anyone who still has the RR theme song stuck in your head.)

So the books my mom got us were right.  And my mom was right that we needed to read the books.  Just like she was right that he would love hanging out in his swing.  And exactly like she was right on target with a million other suggestions, both big and small.  How am I supposed to raise a child who listens to his mother if I don’t listen to mine?!  So, Mom, any more ideas?  This time, I promise I’ll listen!

But the song reference for this entry is about all of you out there in cyberland reading this blog.  I have been absolutely floored by the number of people who read these ramblings on a regular basis… Members of our church family, my parents’ friends and colleagues, my co-workers and Derek’s – lots of people I don’t even know!  I met a woman at church who introduced herself and said, “I feel silly introducing myself – I feel like I already know you because I read your blog!” 

It’s funny, because I have no idea who reads these pages.  A few friends and family members post comments fairly regularly, so I know those folks are reading it.  But apparently there’s a whole host of other people who check in now & again to see what’s new in our world.  When I log out, I can see how many people have viewed the page that day, and how that stacks up against other blogs hosted by NC State.  When Jay was in the hospital, we were consistently the most viewed page.  Literally hundreds of you were checking in EVERY DAY.  It’s been an interesting way to relate to people – reconnecting with old college friends, and meeting new people solely because of the blog.  When I write, I feel almost anonymous because I truly don’t know who stops by to read.  It’s almost like writing a diary, but it’s incredibly public.  It’s fascinating that the internet has opened up so many new ways to communicate with one another.

But I’m truly glad you’re out there reading and that you have an interest in our lives.  There were so many people who prayed for us during Jay’s hospitalization and surgery, and those prayers strengthened all three of us.  It’s amazing to think that the little baby attached to all those tubes and wires is now a strong little guy who’s happy, smiling … and healthy.

  Posted by jmfoster ( May 04 2008, 03:24:32 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [2]

Take a look; it's in a book...
...Reading Rainbow!

Butterfly in the sky; I can go twice as high
Take a look - it's in a book
Reading Rainbow
I can go anywhere
Friends to know, ways to grow
Reading Rainbow
I can be anything
Take a look - it's in a book
Reading Rainbow

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c6j8EiWIVZs
That, my friends, is proof that Google knows everything!  Children of the 80's, watch the YouTube video above - brings back a flood of memories.

So, the book story is that this weekend my mom bought us not one, not two, but THREE books on how to raise a child.  Apparently she thinks it's only by the grace of God that we've made it this long without doing permanent harm to our child.  Oh wait...

Anyway, we split them up.  I started with BabyWise, which is supposed to help with scheduling and getting your child to sleep through the night.  The idea is that children who are on a routine function better.  Seems logical - the fact that I have not had any sort of routine in the past weeks certainly has reduced my functioning!  Of course, functioning on major sleep deprivation is probably a factor, but that's why we're reading this book...  routine leads to better sleep and better sleep leads to happier kid.  Anyway, the author's big push is that your baby needs to eat, then play, then sleep (nap or nighttime).  Like most parents, we'd been letting him eat, fall into milk-induced coma (uh, I mean sleep), and then wake up to scream and fuss (uh, I mean play.  That's it.  PLAY.)  So we're trying VERY hard to keep him awake after he eats, then put him down for a nap while he's still awake, and then wake him up when it's time to eat again.  The book says that he needs to learn to put himself to sleep instead of always falling asleep in our arms.  Of course, the only way to learn this important life skill is to scream your way through it.  My friend refers to this as "Baby Boot Camp."  Just call me the General.

But the hilarious part of BabyWise is what it recommends during the awake/play times.  For example, it suggests for the midafternoon (I'm quoting here...)
"1. Feeding and diaper change.
2. Waketime: Play with your baby; have him or her by your side as you read or sew.
3. Put your baby down for a nap."
Yeah, I've been just sewing up a storm lately.  In fact, I'm thinking of going into business as a seamstress.  You have got to be kidding me - he's supposed to just sit there contentedly watching me sew?! 

Derek has been reading The Baby Whisperer.  It's written by a cute little British woman who refers to you the reader as "luv" on a regular basis and calls me "Mum" and "Mummy."  But she also recommends the same eat/play/sleep schedule - which she ironically refers to as the E.A.S.Y. routine - Eat, Activity, Sleep, time for Yourself.  Ha!  The only time I've had for myself is when I go to the bathroom, and then I can still hear him screaming over the monitor.  Okay, and the time yesterday when Jay's new favorite babysitter came to relieve me for a couple of hours.  Let me tell you, I've never enjoyed going to Kroger so much!  I can't say much for the Baby Whisperer since I haven't finished it, but I'll let you know just how E.A.S.Y. this schedule is when we've tried it a few more days.

Then we are going to read "The Essential Guide to Baby's First Year."  The goal here is to find out what Jay is "supposed" to be doing at various ages/stages.  I think my mom's ultimate goal was to find something else to brag about to her buddies.  I mean, you can only brag about him being the cutest baby on the planet for so long.  Eventually, you have to move on to bragging about how advanced he is for his age...

I think there may be something to this grandma business.  That may be even more fun that being a mom!

Posted by jmfoster ( Apr 30 2008, 10:21:34 AM EDT ) Permalink Comments [2]

When I see you smile...
I can face the world, oh
You know I can do anything
When I see you smile
I see a ray of light, oh
I see it shining right through the rain
When I see you smile
Baby, when I see you smile at me

Jay has learned his first cool baby trick - smiling.  (Sorry, but audible pooping and projectile vomiting do not count as cool baby tricks.)  Sure, he'd already mastered the "I'm about to fart" smile and the sleeping "I'm dreaming of milk" smile, but this is now the real deal.  The "I recognize your face and I'm happy about it" smile.  While I know that there will be many milestones to come, and I'll celebrate his first tooth, his first steps, his first word (and it had better be "Mama"!) as if he's the first child to ever do those things, I really like the first smiles.  It's like he's really a person with real emotion and a real personality, not just a hungry, screaming mouth to feed.  It's his way of communicating "Hey, I like you!" And I really like that. 

But he's got lots of other entertaining facial expressions as well.  Check out:

Baby Elvis...



Screaming for more milk



Breaking it down, dancing the Cabbage Patch!



And last but not least, that grin!



Posted by jmfoster ( Apr 27 2008, 09:47:16 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [4]

How do I live without you?
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive?

Okay, you would think from the song lyric title that this post is about wonderful it is to have Jay in our lives and wondering how we lived before him ... but it's not.  While we certainly feel that way (most of the time!), this post is about the STUFF that has become such an integral part of our lives that we can't imagine life without it.  So here's a top ten list of baby products that we just can't live without...

#10 - Baby view mirror in the car.  For all those times when you want to know why he's screaming in the backesat...oh wait.  Even Snow White's magic mirror can't explain that.  But at least you can look to see that he's still breathing. 

#9 - Medela Quick Clean Micro-steam bags.  Just rinse off that paci that landed on the nasty floor of the hospital waiting room, toss it into the bag with some breastpump parts, add 2 oz water and nuke it.  PRESTO!  Clean enough to stuff in a baby's mouth.

#8 - Munchkin dishwasher rack for bottles, nipples, rings, etc.  We thought that 6 bottles would be enough. HA!  When he's eating every 3 hours, those bottles pile up faster than the pile of unread newspapers & magazines we're accumulating.  Get lots of extra bottles, and toss those suckers in the dishwasher.

#7 - Baby Bjorn carrier.  This works better for Derek than for me, but Jay loves to ride in this carrier.  I figure, I carried him for 9 months, now it's Dad's turn to find out just how tired your back can be with an extra person to tote around.

#6 - Medela breast pump.  I never thought I'd spend so much time attached to plastic parts.  And thank goodness for its auto-shutoff feature.  I heard a horror story of a friend who fell asleep at her pump and the result was not pretty.  Funny to laugh at later, but not pretty at the time.

#5 - Fisher Price Cuddle Ducks swing.  I mentioned this in a prior post, but Jay is absolutely hypnotized by the circling ducks on the mobile on this swing.  When they stop circling, he starts wailing.  If he grows up to be a duck hunter, we'll know why. 

#4 - NC State crib mobile.  Much like his flying ducks, the kid loves his mobiles.  This one plays the fight song - we're training him up right!

#3 - Happiest Baby on the Block.  This book, recommended by my childhood friend, has been a lifesaver.  I don't know that I'd say he's colicky, but he's certainly a fussy kid.  Okay, he cries a lot.  This book has many strategies for calming a crying baby, and while they don't always work immediately, and our parents think our techniques are a little weird, it's been a lifesaver for us.  He's not the happiest baby on our block, but he's at least the second happiest.  (Note that there is only one other baby on our block, so that's not saying much.)

#2 - The PeePee TeePee.  Okay, so honestly, these aren't that useful in real life, but they have brought us enough laughs to make them among our favorite baby products.  The theory is that you stick the teepee over the offending sprinkler to prevent mid-diaper changing fountains.  The reality is that he could shoot that thing across the room with his urine spray.  But they're cute and amusing, so we keep them on the changing table for entertainment. 

#1 - The Miracle Blanket.  Seriously, this thing lives up to its name.  While it looks like you're putting your kid in a straight-jacket (which I've been tempted to do on more than one occasion!) he actually really likes being swaddled so tightly.  We got it as a hand-me-down from Auntie Jen B. (who happens to be president of the Jay Michael fan club) and he liked it so much he pooped on it daily.  To cut down on our laundry, we decided that we needed two since it is the only way we can get the kid to sleep.  New parents, trust us on this one.  You need it.  You may need two.
Posted by jmfoster ( Apr 17 2008, 09:12:46 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [3]

I said "Do you speak-a my language?"

He just smiled and gave me a vegemite sandwich.

(From "Land Down Under" by Men at Work)

Hi everyone, Jay here again.  Since my mom and dad are being so slack about posting here, I thought I'd help 'em out.  I mean, seriously, one message in a week?!  I'm always doing something adorable they could write about!

 

So, I thought I would explain to everyone what I'm doing to try and train my parents.  "Try" is the key word here - they are a little slow in picking up on some of my hints.  I know that I don't speak their English language yet, so I'm trying to communicate with them in MY language, known as baby-ese.  It's so simple, and yet they just don't seem to be getting it. 

 

Baby-ese is a combination language, using both sound and signs to get the message across.  Here are some of the signs:

 

Wide open mouth  = "Feed me"

Wide open mouth with head shaking = "Feed me now"

Lip smacking = "Feed me right now"

Fist into mouth = "I'm so hungry I'm going to eat my own arm"

(You can also combine all of those signs at the same time to mean "If you don't feed me right now, I'm going to eat my own arm, dammit!")

 

And here are some of the sounds:

 

Waaaaaa! = I have a wet diaper

Waaaaaaa! = I have a poopy diaper

Waaaaaaaa! = I'm bored

Waaaaaaaaa! = I'm cold

Waaaaaaaaaa! = I'm hot

Waaaaaaaaaaa! = I'm tired

Waaaaaaaaaaaa! = I'm hungry

Waaaaaaaaaaaaa! = Stop taking pictures of me.  What are you, the paparazzi?

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaa! = Let's go for a ride in the car

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! = No?  How about taking me out in the stroller, then?

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! = Just a walk outside?  Pretty please?

 

See?  Baby-ese is so simple.  If any of you can help my parents figure this out, our lives would be MUCH smoother.

Posted by jmfoster ( Apr 10 2008, 08:57:03 AM EDT ) Permalink Comments [5]

In the still of the night...
I held you
Held you tight
'Cause I love
Love you so
Promise I'll never
Let you go
In the still of the night

(Hope those lyrics brought you a nice little flashback to the movie "Dirty Dancing" - one of my faves!)

It's 3:26 in the morning, and I'm up writing this blog when I should be sleeping.  I know, "sleep when the baby sleeps" is the rule, but tonight I'm just awake.  I've spent many nights up at this hour.  I pulled a few all-nighters in college cramming for exams or finishing up papers that should have been written during daylight.  I've even enjoyed some late night fun that kept me out on the town this late into the night.  As a champion worrier, I have spent more than a few nights up at this hour, watching late-night infomercials and imagining one potential catastrophe after another.  Why is it that our anxieties always seem a million times worse at 3 a.m. than at 3 p.m.? 
But tonight I'm not up for any of those reasons - I'm up with the baby, just like I've been up with him every night since we brought him home. 

It was one month ago today that Jay was born at 2:31 a.m.  I thought I understood exhaustion that night, after being in labor for more than 24 hours and struggling through a long and difficult delivery.  But that kind of tired has nothing on the kind of tired I feel now after weeks of sleeping only in 2-3 hour spurts.  On a good night, Jay will sleep 4 hours between feedings.  Let's just say tonight has not been one of those 4 hour nights!  I'm a big fan of sleep, and it's a luxury I haven't been enjoying the way I would like.

And while I'm suffering from a major case of exhaustion during the daytime, I really do like the middle of the night snuggles I get to enjoy after feeding him.  After Jay eats, we try to keep him upright for at least 20 minutes to help keep him from spitting up.  (When we've struggled to get every ounce into him, we don't want to see a single drop coming back up!)  While some nights all I want to do is drop him back into his crib and fall back into my bed, that 20 minutes has become some of my favorite time with him.  He's much more snuggly with Derek than with me - for some reason he just settles into Derek's shoulder better during the day.  But at night, he'll cuddle up on my shoulder and let me enjoy some some snuggles, too.  Tonight, I spent the whole time praying, thanking God for the amazing blessing of having him here, having him at home and healthy. 

Never thought I'd feel so lucky to be up all night long.


Posted by jmfoster ( Apr 07 2008, 02:48:36 AM EDT ) Permalink Comments [8]

He's a chunky monkey!
Okay, so I ran out of music lyrics.  I couldn't think of any song lyrics relating to the topic except Weird Al Yankovick's "I'm Fat," and I already promised that I would avoid any more Weird Al songs.  Why is it that his songs just seem to fit so well?  Maybe it's because he and Jay have the same maturity level... who knows.

We have exciting news!!  Jay went to the pediatrician today and he weighs a whopping 10 pounds 7 oz.!  Yes, that means he's regained his birthweight and put on some extra.  Feeding went really well over the weekend.  He's pretty consistently getting 3 oz. per feeding, and thanks to the greatest lactation consultant on the planet, he's also attempting to breastfeed as well.  (Thank you Moira!)  While he's not getting enough to sustain him on breastfeeding exclusively, when you add the bottles that he's getting to the nursing, he's really eating like a champ.  (Knock on wood that it lasts!)  We go back again next Monday, so we'll have a better idea how well he's keeping that weight on.

Today is the first day that Jay and I are totally on our own, and I must say that I'm pretty proud of myself that I got him up and dressed, along with getting myself up and dressed (with a shower, no less!), and to the pediatrician by 10 a.m.  So, maybe I can do this baby thing!  He's sitting here beside me in the swing he borrowed from his good buddy Preston, and he is LOVING it. (Many thanks, Bethany!  This thing rocks - literally!)  My mom kept telling us that the bouncy seat was not enough and that we needed to get a swing - and she was right.  (Yes, I was wrong and Mom was right - hard to admit, but sometimes it's true.) 

Happy Monday, everyone!

Posted by jmfoster ( Mar 31 2008, 04:04:18 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [2]

Don't tempt me...

...I'm where I wanna be
Cause on the 8th day
God made Sweet Tea

Last night was an exciting night in Jay's life - his first time with a babysitter.  My favorite band  from our college days, Cravin' Melon, played their last show before splitting up about 7 years ago.  Cravin Melon is a great live band - lots of energy and a ton of fun to watch.  They played a reunion show last night at the Lincoln Theatre and we bought tickets way back before Jay was born.  We figured he'd be at least a month old and we'd be perfectly happy to leave him with Jen's folks for an evening.  We of course didn't expect that we'd have only had him home for a little over a week!  I was a little nervous about leaving him with my folks.  It's been 30 years since they had babies - would they remember what to do?  They can't remember where they left their keys - would they forget where they left my kid?  (Just kidding, Mom & Dad!)

But since this concert was truly a one time opportunity, we decided that Lala and Grandpa Mike could handle any eating issues as well as we could, and we headed out around 8 p.m. last night.  I realized that this was the first time I'd been away from Jay since he was in the PICU.  And I really was pretty good about being apart - I only made Derek check his phone (JUST IN CASE he'd missed it actually ringing!) about 15 times.  That's not so bad, right?  And I even allowed us to have a conversation about something other than milk, spit-up, or diapers.  We talked about the fun times we had going to Cravin Melon shows in college, Derek's plan for going back to work this week, and taking Jay to the doctor.  (Okay, so that last topic wasn't exactly romantic, getting away from the stress of baby conversation.  We couldn't exactly go cold turkey thinking about something else!)

And you know what?  We actually had fun.  I heard someone say that the best thing you can do for your child is to spend time away from him to nurture your relationship with your spouse.  And while it's so hard to find that time, I believe that's true.
Posted by jmfoster ( Mar 30 2008, 07:56:33 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [2]

If I could save time in a bottle...
...The first thing that I'd like to do
Is to save every day
Til eternity passes away
Just to spend them with you

I can't believe we haven't posted on the blog since Monday - it is just amazing how fast the days go by.  I start out each morning with a goal of something I want to accomplish for the day.  These are NOT big goals, mind you - they are things like put away the laundry or unload the dishwasher.  Then I blink my eyes and the day is gone and the pile of laundry is bigger than ever and there are even more dishes in the sink.  I know that exhaustion is taking over when I can't remember the last time I brushed my teeth.  (I know I have brushed them, I just can't remember actually doing it!)  Everyone tells me that it gets better once he starts sleeping through the night, but I fear that is still a long way away!  But I try to remember that the time when he'll wrap those tiny little fingers around mine is short and to enjoy these moments while I can (even the 4 a.m. feedings!)

Jay is still struggling to eat enough, and we're still working on getting him to eat like a 10 pounder.  He is gaining weight, just VERY slowly.  He saw his cardiologist again yesterday, and he seemed quite pleased with how he's doing.  His heart is looking great and we're very thankful for that.  He was also very optimistic that the laryngeal paralysis will improve on its own and that was certainly reassuring.

Several of you have asked about the name of the blog "Torquil's news."  I didn't realize that my older posts disappeared after a certain amount of time.  I started this blog early in my pregnancy before we knew if we were having a boy or a girl.  You can find the original post that explains the name Torquil here.  If you want to see other previous posts, you can click on the calendar at the top right to go back to earlier months.

Here's a new picture so you can see our eating struggles.


Posted by jmfoster ( Mar 29 2008, 08:11:04 AM EDT ) Permalink Comments [2]

I like big butts and I cannot lie...
Unfortunately, Jay's rear end is not a big butt.   And none of his other parts are getting big either.  He's still not putting on weight like he should and hasn't regained his birth weight yet.  In a normal baby, the fact that he's still below birth weight at 2 weeks old wouldn't be a huge problem.  But in a baby whose body is healing from major surgery, he needs more calories than he's getting for his body to recover.

So we are starting a two part approach - part one is adding powdered formula to the breastmilk he's already getting to add some calories.  But part two is the fun stuff ... baby torture to keep him awake during feedings!  My mom always says "Never wake a sleeping baby."  Unfortunately, we're gonna have to wake him up if he's going to chunk up.  We've already tried the easy approaches including mid-feeding diaper changes and frequent burping/position changes to try & keep him alert.  Now we're moving on to the big guns - cold washcloths, naked feeding and toe tickling.  Don't YOU want to sit there naked, shivering, and being tickled while you try to eat your breakfast?!  Let the fun begin! 

In other news, Jay went to his first party yesterday to celebrate Easter with his Raleigh extended family.   He behaved like a champ!  He didn't seem to care that we passed him from one person to another all afternoon/evening, and he happily sat in his carseat while we ate our Easter dinner.  He made flirty eyes at all the ladies who would look his way.  He's gonna be a party animal. 


Posted by jmfoster ( Mar 24 2008, 05:50:01 PM EDT ) Permalink Comments [4]